Other people will appreciate your value to the degree that you appreciate it yourself.
When you think of sales, marketing or persuasion, what comes to mind? Do you get excited about the value you’ll get to share with people or are you worried they’ll think you’re just a pushy sales person? What’s behind that concern?
Over the course of my various careers, I sold knives, vacuums, cars, insurance, B2B services, and real estate. What I learned from one industry to the next was that you have to believe in your product and in yourself. If you don’t, something needs to change.
The way to believe in your product or service is to focus on the value people gain from it. The simplest check is to ask whether the value people receive is more than the money they’re giving you. Another measure is the amount of time or money they can save with your product. A more abstract comparison is how good they might feel from owning your product. As long as you know in your gut that they’re gaining from doing business with you, you’re golden.
The way to believe in yourself is to forget about yourself. Really. Of course you take care of personal hygiene, but when it comes time to interact with your customer, it’s no longer about you. The confidence you want in that scenario comes from focusing on serving your customer. They don’t care about your hangups. They have their own problems and if you want them to have the best experience, your best bet is to look for ways to help them solve them. If you’re focused on the other person, you’re not focused on your self – being self-conscious.
The highest form of service to your customers is to empathize with them. Understand why they feel the way they do and you’ll see how to best serve them. No amount of NLP magic will change those fundamentals.
To recap, find a product you can believe in and look for ways to serve people. Then people will appreciate the value you provide.